Make-It-Do

Here's a pretty nifty link I've come across. It's advice shared by more experienced moms for those who are just starting their families. They have some great things to say, I love the sock advice! I don't have nearly as many kiddos as some of these ladies do, but I have learned a thing or two with my little flock of chicks! Be warned though, this is a soapbox of mine! ;)

The first thing I thought of was to teach children to do things for themselves. I don't want my kids to think they can whine at me if they are thirsty and I will immediately stop everything that I'm doing, jump up, run to the kitchen, and get out a cup to pour them a drink! It sounds kind of silly to have to mention this at all, but sadly I see it happening all the time. I believe that's just teaching them to be self-centered and demanding. But I know that with multiple children in the family kids learn to fend for themselves quickly, since mommy is usually occupied with the babies. The older ones learn that if they want something bad enough they better darn well figure out how to do it on their own!

This extends though to nearly every other areas of their lives as well. We need to teach them how to do household chores without having to hover to make sure they do it properly. It's either done or it's not. A couple of weeks ago a friend who has two small kids asked me what I thought a 3 year old was capable of doing around the house. My response was "More than you think!" Putting away their folded laundry, clearing off the breakfast table, picking up after themselves, they really can do many things. It's actually more difficult to teach them how to do some things rather that just doing it yourself, but in the long run you're not just teaching them how to do a task, you're also teaching them to be faithful in the little things.

Schoolwork also goes more smoothly if the kids can read the directions on the page and follow them on their own. I shouldn't have to read a math lesson to my 11 year old if she is perfectly able to read it herself. Most often the case is that she understands it much easier than I do anyway and I'm just hindering her from getting it done quickly! I believe that as soon as a child can read words and comprehend their meaning, they can follow written directions, even my 1st grader can do it.

I strongly believe we are doing our children a great disservice in allowing them to be completely dependent on us, by not giving them the tools they need to run a home of their own. I know many girls who move out of their parent's homes, go to college, or get married, and still don't know how to make a casserole, or wash their white clothes! I was one of them! What good is knowing how to diagram a sentence if they don't know how to balance a checkbook for goodness sakes? Our job as mothers is to train them to be able to live on their own without our help. I think we forget sometimes that there will be a day when they are going to move out and have families of their own. Will they be able to survive without us doing everything for them?

*Deep breath* Yes, that was ranting a bit. This is obviously a daily battle in our home. I barely know what I'm doing as a mother and homemaker as it is, so I'm trying to learn for myself and teach my daughters at the same time. Not an easy thing to do! Children really are very intelligent creatures, able to learn things much quicker than we think. Encourage them to use the brains that God gave them. Teach them how to reason out a problem. Make them untie their own knots! They'll have to learn sometime in their lives as it is, the sooner the better for everyone's sakes!